What will I do?

My vacation is going well. It's everything a vacation should be. It began with lots of family time and now it's just me. Me, in my house. By myself. Relaxing.

There's plenty of time for reading, listening to music, jogging, organizing things (as librarians tend to do), catching up with friends, walking, etc.

But I'm kind of going crazy. Stir crazy. Cabin fever crazy.

I've only been here for a few days by myself and I've exhausted all conversation possibilities with myself. I've cleaned as much as I can. I've played the piano for hours. I've read for hours. I've watched movies for hours. I've stared at my phone wishing people to call me. I've checked my email 100 times a day. I've blogged here and there multiple times.

I'm currently packing my things for my road trip, which begins later this week, but I'm so distractible. I feel like I have ADD.

Each time I leave the house to go on a made-up errand, I desperately want someone to be here when I return. But there never is. I want to come home to someone, to talk to someone, even if it's about nothing. I know I've said it before, but I really would love to have a friend in the exact same stage of life as I am right now. Right here. Someone I can call randomly or who I can plan to see every day. Someone who understands where I am.

Here's the dilemma. I am on day #4 or #5 of "Alone-time", and I'm going bonkers. What am I going to do next summer when I have two entire months off? I'll have to get a summer job just to keep myself busy, preoccupied, and to not go insane. Part-time at a clothing store? Mostly for the discount on clothes. It's a possibility, I guess...

I've promised to fly out to Arizona to babysit/nanny the girls for a few weeks in June, next yea. So that'll help to keep me very busy, but only for a short period of time. Seriously...I need a game plan for the rest of the time.

If I could organize my life like a job - have planned events and projects to accomplish and check off of lists - then I could probably make it without needing an income-producing job. It's not for the money. It's for me. I can't sit still.

I guess the most disturbing part is that this idea of ADD Lana is so contrary to who I thought I was. I thought I was quiet, introspective, and easily amused. When I step away and look at myself, that's always what I see. Upon further reflection recently, I think I am those things, at times. But increasingly, I'm finding myself unable to be still. I've trained myself as an efficient multitasker throughout my school career and now I don't know how to be anything else.

Any advice, friends and readers?