It's true, I don't like Star Wars. I'm totally not a fan.

When I was in high school, my brother Evan somehow convinced me that we should watch the Star Wars marathon on TNT. I was so bored that I couldn't sit through them all, but I did get glimpses of each whenever I passed through the family room and his completely engrossed self on the couch.

Last year, I visited a group of professional singles in the area for a movie night. Though they didn't disclose it until I arrived, the movie of the evening was one of the original Star Wars. All that I remember about it was a giant, slimy, sloth-like, dictator being with an army of weird-looking, animal-esque strange creatures. And Princess Leia chained to the nasty leader. We all brought desserts, which was, in my opinion, the best part of the whole event, and I leaned against a person-sized teddy bear (which belonged to our host, a middle-aged male science professor) on the hard floor for the duration of the film. Uncomfortable, at best.

I have not witnessed any of the newer Star Wars episodes, those with Natalie Portman, Ewan McGregor, and Hayden Christensen, even though I enjoy all of those actors.

The above statements and obvious underlying feelings about the series do not mean that I can't appreciate when somebody else loves the movie. Such as this little girl.

A Witness to my life

Somewhat embarrassed, I have to admit that I came across this profound quote in the movie Shall We Dance? which discusses why people get married.

"We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'."

Movies

Watching movies, I've realized, is a brilliant hobby for a single person. You can watch anything you want, only needing to match the movie to your own mood, not the moods of an entire group of people. Having friends around is also great, because, when you need to, you can watch movies with them, too.

Liz, Chalupa, and I saw Bourne Ultimatum this afternoon.

Thrilling up until the last few minutes. Not too many car chase scenes (as Liz indicated, get old pretty quickly). Tons of intense, near-miss moments between would-be assassins and their escaping prey. Not everyone was so lucky, as always must happen in these types of movies.

Highly recommended.

Also, watched Veronica Guerin last night. Very sad, true story about an Irish journalist from Dublin who was murdered by drug gangsters in the mid-90's. Also recommended.

List of movies currently in theaters that I want to see:
Becoming Jane
Chuck and Larry
Hairspray
Harry Potter (for the second time)
Ratatouille
Stardust

WIN SOME, LOSE SOME

I love watching movies. I also love hanging out with friends. I've done quite a bit of the first in the past 2 weeks, and very little of the second.

Last night I was able to meet several friends of a friend, and contrary to my usual reactions to such meetings, I thoroughly enjoyed myself. In fact, it made me want to move to Arizona even more than I thought possible. Since it's my dream deferred, I've been laboring to repress that longing, but I can do that only for so long. Andrea is a good, old friend. And the people she lives with and those she is friends with are amazing. This gives me hope that when I do make it out here, I may find some normal, fun friends, too.

Because I love watching movies, I also love sharing my favorites with other people. Sometimes I try to stretch the minds and limits of my family by introducing them to my favs. Tonight I attempted this with my mom and sister and the movie Where the Heart Is. Leslie did not enjoy the movie. Several times she commented, "This is the most ridiculous storyline ever. I can't believe I'm watching this." Mom kept the negative comments to herself, but her sighing, which I can interpret better than most (being a sigher myself), spoke volumes. Too much immorality, too much destruction. Luckily, these days I am less swayed by their opinions, in that, if I share a favorite song or movie or book, and they dismiss it according to their values, I am still secure in my adoration of said item. I'm sad they can't enjoy all of the things that bring color and vibrance to my life, but we each have our own things. Thank God I can appreciate that now.

Today, so close to the new year, I feel like I have won in that I enjoyed myself when in my previous existence I would have been too anxious, too scared to open up to new people. I won in sharing some of the things I love with those closest to me, and in thus separating their reactions from my own personal opinions. I may have lost a few things, but it's worth it to be self-assured, secure, and happy. To embrace those around me, first, and question later. To step out in faith and to find goodness waiting. This is why I have won.

UPDATE! UPDATE!

This just in....

I found my old t-shirts - my absolute favorite from 7th grade that I wore until I went to grad school last year; and the replacement Mr. Bubble shirt for the original Mr. Bubble shirt from freshman year of high school (the first had to be pitched because it was so thread-bare). The best news, of course, was that I found a 3rd shirt with them. The green American Eagle one with a dragonfly on it that I have loved and also wore for many, many years. I had a senior picture taken in both the one from 7th grade and the green one. My favorite senior pic was in that green shirt, despite the fact that I was basically hanging out in a tree (to match the green) in a long-sleeved knit shirt and khakis in the middle of July.

In other news, Casino Royale is definitely worth seeing, and this from a girl who doesn't like Bond movies at all.

Also, the Bruschetta Chicken Pasta at T.G.I. Friday's is phenom. Eat it.