a long reprieve

I'm going home. Which is exciting in and of itself. I don't have to go to the grocery or "cook" for myself. I don't have to get up early or go to bed before I crash. These are good things.

I'm going home for a week. Eight lovely days. This is needed, considering I'm going crazy in my little room. But there is one other thing to look forward to, and that is moving into my own apartment.

I found out yesterday that I now have somewhere to live when I start my job in January. It's a lovely apartment and will be at least four times the space I have right now. Ah! Space!

I can't even express how thrilled I am to move on, to reach the stage of life I've been dreaming about since I was 8 years old - adulthood. Up till now I've been a student, which in a way is mutually exclusive from adulthood, at least for single students.

A friend of mine has mentioned several times how interesting it will be to see if I change or how I react to having a normal schedule without the pressure of homework and due dates, etc.

I hope to be freer - both with regard to my time and internally. To get back to the point where I can sit in silence or be still without feeling like I should be doing something else. Not that I think adult life means no stress. Of course I've been around long enough to have observed that everyone has stressors. I'm seeking balance. That's what I really want to find.

Today I realized the significance that creating music has in my life. Over the past six years I have progressively reduced this process from my life. Maybe this is why I've grown more and more unbalanced as I've finished my degrees. The joy of making music, being the origin of that beautiful experience, is something I cannot wait to reintroduce to my life. Just a few short weeks. Or a month, maybe two.