Yesterday was my one-month anniversary from eye surgery. I can't believe it's only been a month.
I feel like my vision is really good, but I still have trouble focusing at times. I'm not sure if it's related to something or not, or if it's some astigmatism that will need corrective eye wear. It's not really enough distortion to slow me down, but it can be irritating. Like if someone asks me a question that requires me to read something far away and no matter how much I squint at it, I cannot make out the word(s). I do have quite a few floaters, too, which make focusing a bit difficult as well. I'm not sure what to do about that. There isn't a cure for floaters, although I read yesterday that they tend to dissipate after a while. I can only hope, right?
It hasn't kept me from reading books either, although I find the transition from reading text in front of me to focusing further away takes longer than I remember it did prior to the surgery. I think I've read three books in the last two weeks, which has been wonderful, as I hadn't read a book from late December through early March. The latest one, I finished last night: Cry, the Beloved Country. I had a feeling that I'd read it before, but when I reached the end, I knew I hadn't. It's such a beautiful story of love, redemption, hope, and mercy, even while dealing with death, corruption, hate, and segregation. I may put it on my list of favorite books. Paton is an excellent story-weaver, and upon reading the introduction which included a little bit of a speech he gave about the book, I can see his heart for South Africa and Africa as a whole throughout the novel. It is heart-breaking and yet hopeful.
I keep a running tab on all books that I've read, probably since 2006 or 2007. The latest additions (and near future ones, as well) are from a list of 40 classic novels that I found online. While I had read a sixteen already, I've added three in the last two weeks. The Catcher in the Rye (which I did not enjoy), The Call of the Wild (which I loved), and Cry, the Beloved Country. Next up I have Zora Neale Hurston's classic Their Eyes Were Watching God. A friend of mine did her senior English paper on this book, and I've wanted to read it since (that's 5 years, folks). I think I'll start today.
You'll remember, if you followed my post-surgery updates, that I had a scare with rubbing my eye only a week after the procedure. Well, I did it again last night, only I didn't freak out this time. It just irritated me that I did it. I've had no issue with this since I quit wearing the goggles to bed about a week ago. I don't know if I was subconsciously commemorating the anniversary of my surgery or what. But I think I'll be okay this time.
Next week I have my one-month appointment. Hoping for great news.
Showing posts with label eye. Show all posts
Showing posts with label eye. Show all posts
19 March 2010
02 July 2009
Hope...
Hope: to not give in to despair and cling to a dream
Since I was probably 12 years old, I have had one particular dream that has gotten me through a lot of discouraging times.
You see, I have terrible vision. I got glasses for the first time in second grade and my eyes continued progressing into myopia at such a steep rate that by the next year I had hard contacts. The goal was to allow the hard contacts to prevent such quick myopic transitions. If it worked, it was hard to tell. Today, my vision is a -13.5 in one eye and -11.5 in the other, both with increasing astigmatism. That makes me substantially more legally blind than most. My eye Dr. used to try to encourage me by saying that contacts can correct up to -20, but that isn't so encouraging anymore, considering my eyes just changed a whole number in one year.
The dream, a gift really, to a visually impaired little girl, was given to me by my eye Dr. "You can have LASIK. It can fix your vision, even vision as bad as yours." At the time, my vision was bad, but not terrible. I was thrilled and began saving for this procedure from that day on.
Well, things got in the way, of course. College and grad school. I had to use money for those things. But, after I got my first real job, I continued building my savings for one ultimate purpose--not a house, not a vacation, but to SEE. To finally see the clock when I wake up, or through the window, or, more recently, the face of my husband in the morning.
A few years ago, I had my first consultation. I knew I couldn't get the consult without having the money in hand to continue with the surgery. But I received devastating news that day. My vision was too advanced and my corneas too thin for the surgery. "You are not a good candidate for LASIK," he told me. I thought I would faint.
I cried all the way home. I cried all day. It was the death of a dream. I know this may seem dramatic, but I haven't been able to see since I was 7. That'll be 20 years this September.
In a cruel twist of fate, Kyle, the man I married, had bad vision too. But he was able to have LASIK and has been known to make comments about how life-changing it has been for him. Sometimes just knowing that is so frustrating. My dream didn't seem insurmountable, originally, and yet now...
The only possibility of corrected vision, for me, is a more intensive surgery--the implantation of a contact lens. Sounds insane, but could be awesome. Kyle has encouraged me to pursue it, and so after two years of nursing my heartbreak at the death of my dream, there is a little hope. They told me two years ago the surgery would cost $10,000, money that I did NOT have in hand. But the information I received today says it is only $7,000 (for both eyes).
There are two different types of ICL (implantable contact lens) surgeries. One puts the lens between your cornea and iris. This is a rigid lens that can be seen from the outside, if you look hard enough. The other surgery puts the lens behind your iris and the lens is more flexible and not detectable, except during an eye exam when they look back into your eye with the bright and painful yellow-blue light.
Whereas LASIK is a very quick procedure and recovery can be nearly instantaneous, the implanted lens, as you can imagine, takes more time to complete and recover from. However, I have a first-hand success story from which to glean information. A woman I work with had this surgery done several years ago, and, in her words, "it has changed my life".
I needed this hope to continue, since sight is such a precious gift. I have prayed since I was young for a day when I can wake up and see without glasses or contacts. Maybe in a few years, maybe in a decade, but I once again believe it could happen.
I think I'll start saving up my pennies again.
Since I was probably 12 years old, I have had one particular dream that has gotten me through a lot of discouraging times.
You see, I have terrible vision. I got glasses for the first time in second grade and my eyes continued progressing into myopia at such a steep rate that by the next year I had hard contacts. The goal was to allow the hard contacts to prevent such quick myopic transitions. If it worked, it was hard to tell. Today, my vision is a -13.5 in one eye and -11.5 in the other, both with increasing astigmatism. That makes me substantially more legally blind than most. My eye Dr. used to try to encourage me by saying that contacts can correct up to -20, but that isn't so encouraging anymore, considering my eyes just changed a whole number in one year.
The dream, a gift really, to a visually impaired little girl, was given to me by my eye Dr. "You can have LASIK. It can fix your vision, even vision as bad as yours." At the time, my vision was bad, but not terrible. I was thrilled and began saving for this procedure from that day on.
Well, things got in the way, of course. College and grad school. I had to use money for those things. But, after I got my first real job, I continued building my savings for one ultimate purpose--not a house, not a vacation, but to SEE. To finally see the clock when I wake up, or through the window, or, more recently, the face of my husband in the morning.
A few years ago, I had my first consultation. I knew I couldn't get the consult without having the money in hand to continue with the surgery. But I received devastating news that day. My vision was too advanced and my corneas too thin for the surgery. "You are not a good candidate for LASIK," he told me. I thought I would faint.
I cried all the way home. I cried all day. It was the death of a dream. I know this may seem dramatic, but I haven't been able to see since I was 7. That'll be 20 years this September.
In a cruel twist of fate, Kyle, the man I married, had bad vision too. But he was able to have LASIK and has been known to make comments about how life-changing it has been for him. Sometimes just knowing that is so frustrating. My dream didn't seem insurmountable, originally, and yet now...
The only possibility of corrected vision, for me, is a more intensive surgery--the implantation of a contact lens. Sounds insane, but could be awesome. Kyle has encouraged me to pursue it, and so after two years of nursing my heartbreak at the death of my dream, there is a little hope. They told me two years ago the surgery would cost $10,000, money that I did NOT have in hand. But the information I received today says it is only $7,000 (for both eyes).
There are two different types of ICL (implantable contact lens) surgeries. One puts the lens between your cornea and iris. This is a rigid lens that can be seen from the outside, if you look hard enough. The other surgery puts the lens behind your iris and the lens is more flexible and not detectable, except during an eye exam when they look back into your eye with the bright and painful yellow-blue light.
Whereas LASIK is a very quick procedure and recovery can be nearly instantaneous, the implanted lens, as you can imagine, takes more time to complete and recover from. However, I have a first-hand success story from which to glean information. A woman I work with had this surgery done several years ago, and, in her words, "it has changed my life".
I needed this hope to continue, since sight is such a precious gift. I have prayed since I was young for a day when I can wake up and see without glasses or contacts. Maybe in a few years, maybe in a decade, but I once again believe it could happen.
I think I'll start saving up my pennies again.
09 April 2007
Forgot to mention it
Sophia's eye has been restored.
She can see! And so can I, behind me when I'm driving.
It's very exciting.
She can see! And so can I, behind me when I'm driving.
It's very exciting.
20 February 2007
Series of unfortunate events
Sophia was blinded today in one eye.
She was an innocent bystander, and it wasn't even until after the primary event took place that the blindness took hold.
What happened was this. Some people got in a snowball fight. Actually it was more like 1 snowball per the other person's 25. Sophia was being used for protection from the onslaught and a snowball caught her directly in the left eye, or side-mirror, as it may be.
After a short jaunt to Muncie and halfway back, Sophie lost her eye. It just flew right off, banged against her side and was gone into the darkness of the night. Even streetlights couldn't illuminate where it went.
I was stunned. At first I didn't know what hit me (literally, the side of the car). Then, as I glanced at Sophie's left mirror, I saw nothing but a dry socket, nothing but a gadget with wires. No light. No reflection.
Once the shock wore off, I couldn't help but laugh. Of course this would happen to me and my lovely midnight blue beast. Poor Sophia. Innocent that she is.
But she will forgive me. It's too funny for her to hold a grudge. A SNOWBALL, people. One little snowball. Knocked out her eye.
She was an innocent bystander, and it wasn't even until after the primary event took place that the blindness took hold.
What happened was this. Some people got in a snowball fight. Actually it was more like 1 snowball per the other person's 25. Sophia was being used for protection from the onslaught and a snowball caught her directly in the left eye, or side-mirror, as it may be.
After a short jaunt to Muncie and halfway back, Sophie lost her eye. It just flew right off, banged against her side and was gone into the darkness of the night. Even streetlights couldn't illuminate where it went.
I was stunned. At first I didn't know what hit me (literally, the side of the car). Then, as I glanced at Sophie's left mirror, I saw nothing but a dry socket, nothing but a gadget with wires. No light. No reflection.
Once the shock wore off, I couldn't help but laugh. Of course this would happen to me and my lovely midnight blue beast. Poor Sophia. Innocent that she is.
But she will forgive me. It's too funny for her to hold a grudge. A SNOWBALL, people. One little snowball. Knocked out her eye.
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